found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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