The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
So squirting runs in the family.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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