What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Randomize
