First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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