So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
