Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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