I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
