I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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