sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
