i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
