that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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