I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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