Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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