walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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