so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
