I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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