My nipple is on Facebook.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
