if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
