Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
