no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
