Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize