Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
