dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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