Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
