i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
