Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
