sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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