Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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