just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize