I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
