Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
