We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
