i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize