you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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