I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
