don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize