your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
3pm strippers are depressing
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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