apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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