it hurts more in the daytime
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
