but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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