ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize