do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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