Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
