Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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