you would pick up someone in the library
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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