I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
