just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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