I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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