He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
