It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
