I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
