Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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